Pieces Of Me

Tomorrow is my first day as a veterinary! No more shifts as a nurse… Feels strange. And I’m very nervous. But I guess it will be fine. We’ll see…

I’ve said, as a bit of fun, that everything will be fine just as soon as I finish my studies and start as a vet. No more bad luck, no more anxiety. Hm, that’s tomorrow then I guess? Haha…

I have had a great time back in Kalmar! Worked 2 nightshifts as a nurse when I got back. Jörg, who is a veterinary surgeon, was there both nights. He is very kind and fun to hang out with. We worked a lot together when he was new at Läckeby and became good friends. So the nightshifts were nice. Jens picked me up on Friday afternoon, heading out to the seaside for a picnic. Love, Mira and Saiva too of course . Sooo nice! Sitting in the sun with a close friend, talking and eating grilled chicken. The dogs were playing in the background, and a few times in our food… And eating stuff they shouldn’t… Saiva vomited metal bits from a can she found the day after… When the sun disappeared behind a big tree, we decided to go home and watch a movie. Sweet

On Saturday, I went downtown shopping for a few hours. Bought some Pilgrim jewellery and a pair of shoes. Then I went to wash my car and ended up cleaning it and polishing it inside too. Love was with me. Sat in the grass next to me and looked at everyone passing. Later in the evening I met Fredrica, Emelie and Johan at Kröger’s for some food and drinks . Missed them! Emelie and Johan were a bit tired and went home, but Fredrica and I continued to Oleary’s. More wine and lots of dancing. Fredrica is a great girl and it will be nice sharing her apartment. I will move there 1/8 . The sad thing is that Emelie is the one moving out, because she will move either to Copenhagen or Budapest for veterinary studies. Will miss her

Well, gonna study some now. Don’t really know on what, but anyway… I’m so nervous for tomorrow…

xxx

I had my last day at school yesterday! Ever!!! Yeay

I still have the rest of my final thesis to write, but it’s not that much left and I can work as a veterinarian meanwhile anyway. So I’ll start as soon as I’m approved by the Swedish Board of Agriculture.

Sitting at my mother’s house in Mariefred at the moment, going off to Kalmar soon. I’m working the nightshift as a nurse at Läckeby and don’t start until 9 pm.

I’m looking forward to seeing my friends in Kalmar again. Only been away for 2 weeks, but it feels longer.

I’ve been in Uppsala for a week now and am staying for another one. Attending school of course . But only one week left. Ever! When I’m done here, I will only have to finish my final thesis and it’s not that much left to do on that one either. Nice!

The weather has been fantastic since I got here. Summer for real!!! I’ve had a great time here in Uppsala, as always . School has not been that fun, but meeting all my friends has.

I went to Stockholm yesterday to meet Nathalie, Oskar and Anja. Met them in Tessinparken, Gärdet, close to where Nathalie and Oskar lives. We sat there in the sun for a while and then went for some sushi and shopping. Later I went back to Uppsala for Matilda’s birthday party and after being there for a while we all went down to the school pub. The final pub of the semester and the alcohol where 50% off or something like that.

The weather has been great today! I have spent almost all day in the sun . Bbq in the evening with friends.

The week has been really nice. Staying in Uppsala means always having friends around and I love it! We hang out and spend time together, even if it means just sitting in the couch with school books or the laptop, doing different things. That’s the kind of life I’m used to. Social life. It has been a lot of sun, bbq and socializing this week. Sweet!

Have been doing schoolwork all day today… Lots of memos and some other stuff. Just finished the Animal Ethics Dilemma. Thought it would be boring, but it’s pretty interesting actually. First you take a test to get a personal profile on animal ethical issues and then you go through some special interactive cases with ethical dilemmas, answering questions as they come. Afterwards you can see how your personal profile has changed. I had to do it for school, but anyone can do it.

I feel a little bit better today. Talking with friends and family really helps sometimes. I’m thankful for everyone who cares about me!

Wish I was on Malta!!! So much fun stuff happen there during spring and summer… Well, perhaps I could go there next summer. Save some money for a longer vacation

John Mayer – Battle Studies

John Mayer – I’m On Fire (Bonustrack)

I’m in a really bad mood since a couple of days… For several reasons I guess…

I wish I wasn’t that easy to manipulate, but I am. Have to work on that one…

Lots of stuff have happened lately. Some of which I have just tried to forget, even though I have to face them sooner or later…

Well… I have told myself “never again”. The problem is to realize where I’m headed in time to stop it. Why this particular situation appeared in the first place is my own fault though. I saw the warning signs, ignored them and continued. Sigh. But actually, no real damage done yet. Fortunately!!! Just adding more bricks to the wall I guess… No pink clouds here.

Anyway, when being this full of anxiety and stress, I do not function properly… I do my job as I should, but I’m not really “there”. And I get tired. Really tired. Like “sleeping all day” tired. Which is the opposite to what I should do. I have so much to take care of before I go back to school in a few weeks. Some memos to write and I have to study some, refresh my memory, so to say. About cows and pigs… Large animal medicine.

Hm, generalized anxiety disorder has beed added to all my diagnoses… This doctor seems really good actually, perhaps I should give him a try. Fix me, hehe. Make me normal. Whatever that is… It would be so nice to be able to remember stuff and to concentrate on things more than a few minutes. Not to be this easily distracted and muddle-headed. Getting the cotton out of my head. To be able to think clearly. Less absent-minded and dizzy. Well, we’ll see…

It’s my birthday today! Thanks all my friends and loved ones for all the b-day wishes! I’ve had a good day so far. Hung over though, since I was out with friends yesterday

Micke came here for a visit yesterday. He and Jens have been friends for years. Amanda and I worked the evening shift and went downtown after work to meet Micke and Jens at a pub. Fredrica, Elin and Sara were there too. We sat outdoors under the infrared lamps, really nice . A feeling of the summer to come :) . Micke and I had decided that he would stay over at my place and we have just been chilling today. Watching a couple of movies and eating pizza. Cozy . Working again tomorrow, then I will go with Jens to his house in Dansjö for the weekend.

I ate pizza the day before yesterday too… Too much junk food lately… Jens, Amanda and Fredrica came over to my place and we watched a movie, don’t remember the name of the film, but it was okay. Emelie came when she had finished her evening shift.

Last weekend was nice. Worked the evening shift on Friday, went down to Oleary’s afterwards to say hello to Marcus, who was the dj there for the night. My intention was just to go there and say hi, but I actually stayed for a couple of hours… Amazing how interesting it can be just watching people… I worked 10am-2pm on Saturday. Party in the evening with the girls :) . Marcus joined us at the pre-party and later we all went to Oleary’s. The other girls really like that place, and Marcus too I guess. Martin and Stefan showed up after a while. We danced a lot! As always :) . Met Marcus for the first time a couple of weeks ago. At Oleary’s of course… He is very cute. I don’t always get him or what he wants sometimes, but he is very sweet.

Well, some news for you… I’m staying in Kalmar. For now. Will be working here during autumn too. Can’t really decide what to do with my life, but until I know, I guess I can just stay here. I love working at Läckeby Animal Hospital and I really like my new friends here. Will have to go visit my friends in Stockholm and Uppsala as often as I can though. Who knows, perhaps Kalmar is the town for me, even if I never thought so… I just wish to meet Mr Right too… Letting go of my fears first perhaps…

Valborg, or Walpurgis, was spent in Uppsala amongst friends

Had a great day and the weather was okay. Not as warm as I had hoped, but at least the sun was present some of the time. Anna, Bella and Jonaz was up early and went downtown to watch the students rafting down the stream that goes through Uppsala. Studentgroups from different programmes build their own rafts and try to get the best time down the stream. With varying success… I have seen this event several times, since I have lived and celebrated Valborg in Uppsala for 9 years. It’s not really worth getting up early for, haha. No, just kidding. I’m just very tired in the mornings and need my beauty sleep. And since I’ve already seen the spectacle many times, I decided to stay in bed and wait for Anna to arrive from Västerås instead. She came kind of late, but I wasn’t ready before that anyway (surprise…). We went to buy some picnic lunch and then joined the others at a park alongside the stream. There are a lot of parks in Uppsala and I believe we have visited them all during the years… We usually have picnic in the English Park. But we have also sat in the park at Ekonomikum a couple of years and on the hillside beside the castle. There are lots of people in all the parks and this year we decided to try a new one. We went to Stadsparken, the city park, which lies alongside the stream downtown. It was as good as any. Love came along too. He has been with us every year since I got him . It was Anna, Bella, Pia, Jonaz, Anna G, Nathalie, Matilda and some friends of hers. Cozy!!! We sat there for several hours. Drinking wine, chatting and having fun. Lots of cops though, pouring out alcoholic fluids… But they were mostly focused on underaged and messy people. Fortunately for us

Later in the evening we had a bbq at Anna & Dennis place. More friends joined in. Oskar came from Stockholm, Ann-Sofie and Cilla came after working all day (pouring out alcoholic fluids…) and they brought Pixie along too . Christopher, Sebastian, Frida, Adam, Sara, Robban, Monika and Måns and their cute dogs and some more friends of Matilda’s. We had a great night!!! I didn’t go out clubbing as I usually do these nights. Instead I fell asleep in Anna’s bed sometime after midnight… Well, there has been a lot in my life lately and I was very tired. That plus alcohol and an active day made me fall asleep unwillingly… But I’m very happy with the day. It was close to perfect

It was the first Valborg without Johanna for quite some time…

Basshunter – Every Morning

I have been working so much these last two weeks, including the weekend and I’m very very tired. A lot of overtime and stressful days. Haven’t had the energy for or felt like writing here in a while. Perhaps I’ll write a recap tomorrow…

I’m not sure if I’m gonna write in this blog anymore though… I know I have some steady readers, I don’t know all of you, only the ones posting messages, but we’ll see…

I was off work yesterday . The weather was nice and sunny and I took a long walk with my dog and then I met Fredrica and Emelie downtown for lunch. Later in the afternoon I went to visit Erik in Vimmerby. I needed to get my summer tires, which he has stored for me. And I left Love with him. He is going to stay there for at least 2 weeks. I already miss him! But I want Erik to have him sometimes, so it’s okay. It was nice to meet Erik again. I have missed him. We drank some coffee and talked a lot. The trip home again took longer than I had thought and I wasn’t back home until 10.40 pm. I had planned to meet with Simon in the evening, but we were both too tired and will hang out tomorrow instead.

I worked the evening shift today. Finished at 10.15 pm and went home, changed my outfit and then went to Elin’s place for a pre-party. I didn’t go out with them, but it was nice to hang out some. Sabina was there too, it was very nice too see her again. Haven’t been at the clinic in Borgholm in a while and I have missed her. Jens was there and Sara. And a couple of Elin’s friends. And a guy who I have met once before, Stefan. He is really nice and I remember him as fun to hang out with. We didn’t have time to talk that much though.

On Wednesday, I brought Jens’ dogs home with me after work. He was working the evening shift and we decided to watch a movie at my place later. We saw “The Hangover”. It was fun, but not as funny as I thought… Saiva, Jens’ new puppy, is adorable. Mira is his other dog and very cute and sociable. So sweet. Love likes them both. But he thinks the puppy is a bit too much at times… She wants to play all the time and her teeth are very sharp… But he likes her anyway, I can tell .

There is this one person in Kalmar who I don’t like at all. Not anymore that is… Forgive, forget and let go? Well, letting go was easy, but forgiving and forgetting is harder…

Hm, I forgot David’s birthday. Hehe, I got a reminder from him a couple of days later… Well, I’m so used to getting a reminder through Facebook, that I tend to forget everyone who hasn’t got a Facebook account… Can’t be that many of them out there…

I really don’t know what to do with my life… I want to stay at Läckeby Animal Hospital, but at the same time I want to go somewhere where I can feel at home for real… Sigh. Haven’t felt at home for quite a while now. And it’s something that is very important to me.

I’m looking forward to summer. Not just because of the warmth and sun, but because there will be a more social life in Kalmar as a whole. Jonaz is coming here in July and August! Yeay! And Micke is gonna work in Läckeby from June, I think. I’m really looking forward to hang out some with him. He is so very nice and sweet! I really enjoy chatting with him and it shows that I’ve got used to talk to him a lot, because I miss it if we haven’t talked for a few days.

So, Friday today… I’m working tomorrow and on Sunday. But only 10 am- 2 pm. That’s good. Tomorrow I’ll hang out with Simon and on Sunday I will go to Emil’s place after work. I have never been there, so it will be nice to see how he lives. Then it’s a whole new week. Getting closer to my next Uppsala visit